RuneScape Community Forums (since 2001)

Where did you move from and when did you move to?

You are so wise to understand the impacts that your life makes on others. Your love for your family and friends supersedes anything else this brief life has to to offer you. I am so grateful to know a soul as righteous as you. I love you Teddy so very much.

(12-09-2018, 05:12 AM)Hemlock Wrote: [ -> ]Where did you move from and when did you move to?

You are so wise to understand the impacts that your life makes on others. Your love for your family and friends supersedes anything else this brief life has to to offer you. I am so grateful to know a soul as righteous as you. I love you Teddy so very much.

I grew up in the Midwest of America, and then moved to New York City. My involvement with Zybez marked the first time I developed meaningful connections with people all over the world. I started to wonder about moving to the East Coast, which was initially met with disbelief from others. My immediate family (and those of my friends) has lived within our particular county for generations. But my resolve grew after I went to college and met a lot of people actually from there, and I further realized that my particular profession was best pursued in NYC. Finally, I suspected that it was more of a cultural fit anyway, so I pulled the trigger and made the move. Even when I was leaving the family car to go to the airport to fly away for good, I felt almost nothing...it just felt like going back to college for a bit.

I didn't even initially want to come back for Thanksgiving or Christmas, just because I wanted to save money (even though I was making more than enough). It wasn't until I headed back for the first time that it really hit me how rare these occasions would be if I did not make the effort. It surprised me because I'm a relatively emotionless person, but there were a couple instances where I admit I just cried by myself -- once in the shower when I was back home for the first time, and another time when my family left our vacation a day earlier than I did. I don't remember ever having done that otherwise in my life. I hate to relay a tired cliche about my emotions having been suppressed and bottled up for years, since I don't think that's totally accurate. But that thought definitely crossed my mind, and there might be some truth to it. I think you know what I mean.

Anyway, the first few years after that were quite difficult. On one hand, I loved New York City and knew I had made the right choice in at least the short term. But I missed everyone back home, and daydreamed of moving back after I had made my money. I figured there was no chance everyone else was going to uproot their lives to come live on the East Coast with me; it was up to me to get out. So when a new job opened up -- and I actually had the choice between their offices in NYC and the one near my hometown -- I was surprised that I had come to prefer living in NYC. I reflected that I would always tell my friends in NYC how much I missed my friends back home... but it wasn't until that moment that I started to really recognize the significance of that sentence. "I would always tell my friends in NYC." I realized that I had built a life for myself in NYC and that if I ended up "moving back," then I would just end up missing the life that I had built here, too.

The friends I make now will never be my childhood friends, and I will never have another brother or sister (unless something really crazy happens). But I recognize that it's much easier nowadays to keep in touch with the people you care about, yet you don't have to see somebody every day to have them matter in your life. Even a single phone call every once in a while can mean the world, and the time that gets spent together is almost more precious now because of how scarce it is. I believe I have struck a healthier balance now. I don't get overly emotional when I go back anymore. I just experience it in a more thoughtful and thankful way than I used to. And I'm still not in a race to get back, because I recognize I would be repeating the mistake of not caring enough about the people and experiences I've had here in NYC.

In the back of my mind, though, I do wonder: If I did live back home, would I recall the insights I had made into who and what matters? Or would I start to lapse back into the past of taking others there for granted like how I initially did in NYC? I don't let such fears rule my life; I stayed in NYC for affirmative reasons, and I love it here. But I certainly wonder whether it's a lesson that could be unlearned.

Anyway, I just wanted to repeat another passing statement in closing. I'm glad you're still around the community Hemlock. I always loved talking to you and getting to know you as well. It's wholly fitting that even as I type this message, I recognize that it is possible that this might even be the last time we ever communicate. Eventually one or both of us is likely to go our separate ways from the community. It wasn't until the old community shut down a couple months ago that I relearned that lesson of how important people can be.

You aren't my brother or one of my best friends back home or even one of the absolute closest friends I made on Zybez, but I wanted to take this opportunity to truly express my appreciation for you. It's been over a decade since we first crossed paths, but to this day, you and several other Zybez community members have made a lasting impact on my life. I want to emphasize and express that in a heartfelt and earnest matter. I am disappointed that I made this realization "too late" in some sense; chances are I will never see or talk to many of those memorable people again. But I am grateful to share the experiences with everyone who is still around. A time will one day come that is the last time. I will appreciate each time together with you until then.

-Teddy

While I lived for a portion of my time in Des Plaines, IL in 1975-1977, we moved to England because an aunt of mine from the Holocaust had grown ill and passed. I remember feeling empty and cold outside. It took ten more years for my Bubby and Poppy passing to deeply cry and weep and mourn. At 45 years of age, both of my parents are still alive. My tiny little kitten which is my new avatar is nearly seventeen years old.

Leading? I never led. I demanded people to follow my lead and do things they may not have had the courage to do. Wisdom? Not much. No1 knew far much more than me and W13 had the courage to shine the sword broadly. Tenacious? That was fucking Tim-.That little shit never backed down from any fight whatsoever. I'm proud to have +1ed him from a -3. My faults and weaknesses define me.

I want no praise. If you respect me, give me that and nothing more. Sorry if I seem to rambling on. I'm going through a few physical and mental health issues as of late and I'm feeling like my time is reaching an end.

And, I will never give you the opportunity to never communicate with me. Discord, [email protected], Should you wish to speak over a phone wire, my number is yours. Just do not, under any circumstances, piss off the wife.

My sobriety is doing well. I have been going to meetings, saying prayers, talking to my sponsor and my therapist. My physical health is slowly declining. My feet ache and I am in the process of transitioning over to a cane to help with daily tasks. I've reached the point where I feel like I am ready to officially retire. Money is good and the retirement fund has been growing steadily for the last ten years. I still wish I started it in my twenties but that is no longer an issue I need to gripe over.

My depression has been growing steadily. I've already spoken to my wife, parents, therapist, and intimates regarding this matter. I've been feeling empty and weak; I've been taking more naps in the afternoon. I miss you all very very much and despite how I may have communicated with you in the past, I love you.

(04-21-2019, 05:41 PM)Hemlock Wrote: [ -> ]My sobriety is doing well. I have been going to meetings, saying prayers, talking to my sponsor and my therapist. My physical health is slowly declining. My feet ache and I am in the process of transitioning over to a cane to help with daily tasks. I've reached the point where I feel like I am ready to officially retire. Money is good and the retirement fund has been growing steadily for the last ten years. I still wish I started it in my twenties but that is no longer an issue I need to gripe over.

My depression has been growing steadily. I've already spoken to my wife, parents, therapist, and intimates regarding this matter. I've been feeling empty and weak; I've been taking more naps in the afternoon. I miss you all very very much and despite how I may have communicated with you in the past, I love you.

I don't really know you but I wish you all the best, people can come back from anything, don't give up.

(04-21-2019, 05:41 PM)Hemlock Wrote: [ -> ]My sobriety is doing well. I have been going to meetings, saying prayers, talking to my sponsor and my therapist. My physical health is slowly declining. My feet ache and I am in the process of transitioning over to a cane to help with daily tasks. I've reached the point where I feel like I am ready to officially retire. Money is good and the retirement fund has been growing steadily for the last ten years. I still wish I started it in my twenties but that is no longer an issue I need to gripe over.

My depression has been growing steadily. I've already spoken to my wife, parents, therapist, and intimates regarding this matter. I've been feeling empty and weak; I've been taking more naps in the afternoon. I miss you all very very much and despite how I may have communicated with you in the past, I love you.

Take care!

Hemlock, I'm taken aback to since that your medical situation had worsened like this. I don't know how you're keeping since last coming online - but I hope with the bottom of my heart that things are getting better.

Just stopping by to say that I remember you and your posts from RSC.

While I don't think we ever had any one-on-one interactions, you always struck me as a wise and eloquent person, and your posts were really refreshing to read.

Very sorry to hear of your medical situation. Take care, and keep on being awesome.