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What Regular People Want from AI - Printable Version

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What Regular People Want from AI - W13 - 09-25-2018


  1. I want AI to analyze databases of raw data: inventory/purchases for my restaurant (I own a restaurant), HR database, etc. I want AI to eat it up and spit out conclusions and visualizations: "there's a 70% chance that Cook5 is stealing food", "you're buying too many eggs at once (few and far between) and they're probably going bad before you can use them all up."  "At this rate, you'll run out of onions tomorrow, considering tomorrow is a long-weekend and last year sales were 25% higher than usual during this same holiday. Buy more now."
  2. I want AI to unblur my photos and videos using data from similar sharper images. I want it to create VR-able scenes.
  3. I want AI to listen and watch me and my communication (using my phone) ... and automatically show/tell me information such as: "FYI, that girl's name is Maria. You always forget and call her Martha. Her mom died last month. Her birthday is tomorrow. Don't mention either of those things. Your friends plan to surprise her. Ask her about the book she's reading: Sapiens. She posted about it twice on IG today. Oh yea: your fly's unzipped."
  4. I want AI to replace my doctor and constantly monitor my health, including my mental health, and give me suggestions: "Eat half of this portion and then you can order the carrot cake you like. But later we're gonna go run, ok? And don't say you're tired, you had a long nap earlier. Btw, I checked your poop and you have a parasitic infection -- probably from eating Maria's ass (sorry) last month. I've already added the medications into your post-workout shake."
  5. I want AI to fly my phone: I'll explain. When I go to a restaurant and put my phone on the table, it will automatically stick out four rotors, fly like a drone, snap a few pics/videos of me, and then fly back and sit on the table. The same way, I wanna arrive home, take my phone out my pocket and chuck it into the air... it will instantly flip out the rotors, fly to the table, and land safely onto the wireless charger.
  6. I want AI to create never-heard-before music on the fly for me, depending on my detected mood. I want the lyrics to resonate with me and be about my life. Then, AI will create a whole movie just for me: never seen before and never to be seen again... with me as the star of course.
  7. I want AI to consume all the data about me, and then recreate an avatar version of me - so I can talk to myself... tell and hear jokes... and share memes and stories. Then, recreate other people so I can hang out with people (well, their realistic avatars) without actually bothering to meet them. I want to recreate that hot girl I'm too scared to talk to -- and then practice flirting with her.
  8. I want AI to consume all knowledge on Earth: reading the entire Internet, all books/literature, all research, all photos/videos/audio, and then use this to solve all mysteries and problems. And then, create loads of new inventions, perform experiments/simulations as needed, and optimize every process such as sewage system, government, electricity grid, traffic system, computer processors, airplane design, spaceflight, terraforming, battery tech, robotics, assembly line, fusion power, healthcare, and algorithms. 
  9. I want AI to make schools, universities, countries, money, and jobs obsolete. Everybody will have unlimited wealth as everything will be either unlimited or managed by AI. Wanna fill a swimming pool with champagne? No problem... AI will redirect champagne to you and increase production. If it can't, it will come up with a replacement. It will make it happen or try its best to satisfy you. And with AI working on tech like quantum tunneling and other crazy stuff beyond our scope of understanding, it will just make things happen without us ever understanding how it did it.
  10. That escalated quickly.


RE: What Regular People Want from AI - The duck - 09-25-2018

I want AI to fit in a picture into Word without breaking the entire document

RE: What Regular People Want from AI - Murdoc - 09-26-2018

I could just have watched too many films, but creating AI and making contact with aliens are the last things (I think) humans should do. Obviously our drive to push boundaries is what's gotten the human race so far in the first place, but I think these are just bridges too far and the consequences could be disastrous...

RE: What Regular People Want from AI - Giggity - 09-26-2018

Elon Musk scared the crap outta me in regards to AI on Joe Rogan's podcast. He warned us, but we didn't listen.